Happy New Year

New Year's Eve. The night is upon me, and it's already late enough for the rogue neighbors to light up their fireworks, mostly purchased outside the city limits. My brother and my sisters just left a few hours ago, after a rioutous rendition of kareoke, which startled and entertained his daughter. My dad made us all some burgers, and is watching football while his girlfriend and grandma are sitting in the kitchen. Grandma got upset for a second about my dead uncle.

I tried taking a nap, but knew well enough I wouldn't be able to. I tried to pick something interesting on television, but am settling on some light animated comedies on Fox. It's interesting to me to have made the year pass under the conditions of a pending felony trial and with the circumstances I've endured. I haven't gotten a chance to talk about all of them here, but they do include some flight attempts, as well as a suicide attempt. I have made it to a baptism, and squeezed in a visit to a local bathouse. Life sucks sometimes, but it's glorious at others.

In any case, it's late. American Dad is on, and I'm writing during a commercial. A year ago I was in the infirmary, a first floor cell where I'd get treatments at odd hours, and where I spent an entire month. Now I am in the comforts of the home of a family member, my dad, but still I wear the shackle that has kept me from enjoying more of life's excitements. The rumbling of the fireworks reminds me of the friends I am missing, the family who has left this house until their next time in San Antonio, or in the States.

I am sure I can't be entrusted with more than my own share of life's little burdens; but it's enough to want to write about them so I do. I missed my sister giving birth to my newest neice this week, and have missed the opportunities of attending weddings and funerals this year. I can be as much of a sympathetic family member to others as I can, and even this is limited by my experience as a cellmate on a Myrtle Street compound. I try and remember that my excitability with death is the suppression of sex. My suicides, are my own desireous fantasies played coldly before noone but the fantastical illusionist.

Still we beg the question, as with the whirl of any given extra time inbetween the transporting me through different appointments, what will the next year bring; what meaning can this man have of all this? I say, because I've read it somewhere, that to endure, to see life's prospects continually, and to build character, are my uppermost achieveable goals.

But what of independance, of living freely, of generating prosperity and health? What of communicating my souls desires, and to keep in sight those who are most my pride and joy? What of creating balance between my past and my future; of entering the endless now with prestige and grace? What of these, what of keeping myself in line with my own principles, and transcending the case that I am criminal in intent, and in being? I'd rather live in justice, given to me freely by the courts that require justice to be the rule; meaning, the measure of this man, I pretend not to have any desire that it should tarnish with misdeed; and the measure of this man, is one which I desire to reach great lengths for vindication, and for the vindication of those who have influenced my life and continue to influence my life to this point.

Tammy You Have the Time? w/rewrites

Obscura.
Introduction

Image of a burning sage stick on a stand center stage.

First act.

1.First thing in the morning. Tammy is wrought with the decisions of life, and the difficulty in which to perform them. Expressions as she dresses to audio samplings of global leadership of various kinds.

2. Working day in USA. She stands before two sides of objects. The transfer of objects across the imaginary border between them. They are processors, pens, clippers, and small machines which could be held by a hand. Audio and visual advertisements and PSAs.

3.The career cycle. Tammy is pressed first to work in motion with rapidly accelerated and decellerated audio; as well as new mixes and scrathes: creating an imperfect time.

4. Boundries. The barrier of an incomplete task. Things fail to meet the standards we’d like to place them. The lights and music disconnect from the production. The tension is created.

5. Art from creative tension. The performer finds clarity and perspective. She engages the audience for the first time. The play performance begins.

The comedic value is the silence of the subjects in all this, and the automation of a ridiculous task. Perhaps at the end of the sequence, Tammy finds a thread in her garment, and pulls, without tearing it off.

Second Act.

1. A shot in the dark. A large camera obscura is set up before the audience, as if informational. It's focus is on the audience, and the demonstration of use follows the construction demonstrion.

2. Laundry line/Out to dry. A clothesline on stage shows the audience the finished product.

3. What do others see? The photograph is given a telepromptor to read (somehow visible to audience). The stories could be (don't have to be) popular discussions of current events, scientific inquiry, and spacial surroundings of the theatre. Audio of bomb, soldier song, popular music, auto alarms, mourning women and crying baby.

4. Turn to speak. As the teleprompters play, the performer searches off stage and returns with a grip who places the microphone in front of the photo. The audio goes from the running montage then into voices again of politicians, artists, musicians, characters, and other global leadership. The teleprompter and audio stops. The performer taps the mic.

Third Act.

1. A moment of silence for the audience to speak. The performer walks up to center stage where a device has been installed to clip on four corners of a cloth. A vellous screen carries projected streaming video captured live by the performer, while through lighting allows for more of the objects behind the screen to show through.

2. Time/Lascivious exploits. Grips are facilitating the projector placed before the screen, switching live camera feed to sexually evocative and pornographic scenes. Meanwhile, the backlight on the installation is fully on, creating a translucent sex video, and clear back altar.

3. Infinity/Building a shrine. Behind the screen, the grips at the performer's direction, with soft backlighting as to not entirely draw attention or distort the images on the screen, place objects on a tiered furniture. The tiers hold photos, not in frames, candles, not in holders, money, flowers, and ritual items from death. The items harken the period of death we have currently of wars, famines, political oppressions, or suicides. It is a shrine for the living to reflect.

Closing Act.

The emptied stage returns, with the stand and the sage stick lit. Some of the same vellous screening smothers the lit sage.

End of show.